The Necessities

Our family quite enjoys camping. It's our time together as a family to just be...to explore, enjoy a campfire, camping friends, the great outdoors and even get a little dirty. It's amazing what little you need when you're camping and sometimes makes me wonder why we have all this stuff at home.

A new-to-us trailer may be on the horizon as ours has retired. Which has brought us to viewing camping abodes this past weekend. The boys loved that and wanted to bring each one home! W had to be convinced to put his coat back on as well as his boots even though it's so c-c-c-c-old within a winterized trailer. He was ready to camp!

On our way to the last viewing Sunday, B & me were discussing the layout...triple bunks, separate bedroom, etc & comparing to the other two we had seen. Then from the backseat we heard very clearly,

"Does it have a fly swatter?"

Huh? W's necessity request....a fly swatter.

Shout Out - Revive Day Spa

Every woman of every walk of life can use a little spa time now and again. Whether this is on your own or with a friend....pedicures, manicures, waxing, etc. It takes effort and attention to look great and feel great! Or in the words of Dolly Parton..."It takes a lot of money to look this cheap!"
If you are in south Calgary there's a lovely little day spa, with the friendliest proprietor. Riverside Day Spa is a hidden gem in the new SE....way down south here, almost on your way to Okotoks.
If you're looking to be pampered, look up Miss Lani. She'll take the upmost care of you and you'll come away feeling refreshed, rejuvenated and pampered.

Smiling Down

A dear family friend's death this past week has brought the topic of death closer to home for W as W knew this gentle fellow and loved to spend time on his farm, go for tractor rides, explore, chat with E as he patted his dog, etc. E was a lover of children, pets and mostly his family.

W knew this kind man ...that I have known my whole life...a lifetime friend of my parents.... so explaining his death has been enlightening for all of us.

From my previous experience with children and death I have found that kids keep it light...keep it honest and real. They force you to talk and even laugh, which is a wonderful thing. When my dad died this was my nieces keeping us all open and talking. It was a delight to have them around.

Now, it's our Ws turn to begin learning about the circle of life.

It was so sad and yet sweet to hear him talking to Mrs. W about her husband's death. Talk about being on pins & needles! What will he say?! I couldn't make out every little detail he was saying from the other room, but Mrs. W handled it so well.

Later, when I was tucking W in for the night, and we were having our usual pillow talk, I asked W about his conversation with Mrs. W to which he told me...

"Mr. E did get dead."

"He's smiling down on me from up in the clouds!" said with the sweetest smile and slight excitement in his voice.

Three deaths in three months. Three dear friends.

That's enough, thank you very much.

Thinking in W's terms though...makes it all a teeny, tiny, bit lighter...smiling down from the clouds...

The Weight Loss Challenge Drama Outcome

As you all know, Sat left me gasping for air due to my (confidential )weight being posted for all the office to see. (If you haven't been reading lately, scroll down two posts.)

After work I was just in the worst mood and needed something to change my attitude so I went out, leaving my poor husband and little fellas at home feeling jilted and relieved at the same time. I found myself at church...yes, church. I knew I could lose myself there, be anonymous, and hear a message bigger than my problems.

Anyway, part way into the service my phone starts buzzing....vibrating away. I "discreetly" listened to my voicemail...and did not get struck my lightning. Imagine my surprise to hear a voice from work...one of the gals I had emailed. She had checked her work email from home and wanted to discuss my email, was shocked, and bound & determined to find out who had done this.

Five minutes later and my phone is vibrating again. Thank goodness there was no one sitting right beside me. Are the locusts coming now?

Lady #2, my boss, calling to confess that SHE had written the weight on the poster, but that she didn't know it was supposed to be confidential and to please call her.

After the service, I found a comfy chair by a fireplace and called #1. She was shocked by my email...what had transpired... as she had assumed the weight was posted with my permission and had admired how brave I was. Ha! I laaaaaughed. Brave? Not even close. After much discussion she asked that I call #2 who was in tears over the misunderstanding.

Call #2....she fully admitted to posting the weight...thought it was okay to do so...teary....yet stated she would not take full responsibility as she didn't think she was doing anything wrong at the time. I don't get that.

I don't get it! Confidentiality was a rule. Plus, #2 had initially declined joining unless she could be the team leader (keeper of the weights) because she didn't want anyone to know her weight.

Huh? Then how was it okay to post a weight when NO ONE else had their numbers noted?

Now, there was no intention behind this thoughtless mistake. It was just....devoid of attention.

So...I'm glad she felt bad...,however, it's a little disappointing that full responsibility wasn't taken.

Ah well... she did call the office and have the evening staff take the poster down and today it's up with my weight whited out. This cracks me up! A big white-out mark on a colored poster...let the evidence show there is drama about!

I think I'll place a big happy face sticker there.

And make "I beat anorexia" Tshirts for the three of us.

So there it is.... what's done is done. Still blows my mind. I don't get it. Get how someone could be that careless....especially after making a big deal that they wouldn't join if other people would know their weight.

On the other side...I'm not going to dwell on it anylonger as it'll drive me even more mental and then a grudge will be held. Which is not worth it.

It's all out in the open and hopefully lessons have been embraced. What did I learn? That I get a little pi$$y about stuff....I'm still super-sensitive about my weight/size....accountability and confidentiality are under-rated....and lightning didn't strike when my cell hummed twice in church. Wuhoo!! That's gotta be a good sign for something.

"Well, if that doesn't fire you up, then yer woods wet."

Most importantly, one thing I really learned and saw through all this is the comfort and encouragement my friends give me.
All of you who left comments, really touched my heart and held me up. And I thank you for this. It really encouraged me that you all supported me and didn't just think I was off side for even being upset.
So, I thank you. I thank you for your kind words, your spit-fire-fighting words and for all your support.
Thank you, my friends, you're beautiful.

February Theme....Oh Boy!

Thimbly Things & Made by Rae have started a wonderful wave this month.

Celebrate the Boy.

Sometimes boys are overlooked...even in little ways. For example, try to find crafts and sewing projects that are boy oriented. It's not easy!

Not to forget the deeper subject of raising boys...raising boys in a way in such that their boy characteristics are accepted, embraced and celebrated. Raising boys to become amazing men....like our husbands.

So here's to our boys! I challenge all of you with boys out there to find a way to celebrate your boys all month long.

??Gobsmacked!!

It's Saturday morning I am verclemped...swaying back forth between gasping for air, laughing and the potential anger...pi$$ed off feelings...threatening to rise up...I'll stick with laughter for now.
Here's the scenario:
At work. (Did you know I work out of the home? A little fun, non-stressy part time, weekend job which gives me a bit of mad money, sanity and adult conversation) we are having a weight loss challenge between RAs (Resident Associations...aka Community Assoc.) within the city. So, this WLC entails weekly weigh ins, a small enrollment fee, confidentiality, inspiration and friendly competition. Right on par with a New Year a New You kind of attitude.
It was made very clear about the confidentiality portion. Our team leader is to be the only one who knows our weight. Every week whether we are up or down, by how much, and our goals (ie: lose a dress size, acquire more energy... are some examples) are posted on a huge poster board in the staff office.
Now, let me explain that I work with a few very slim women. I am definitely "above average" in comparison to the demographics in this office. I KNOW this. So, does everyone else. It's obvious. Hello! My eyes work sista!
So, I am still gasping for air at the site of MY initial weigh in weight documented in green ink for all the office to see! WTH??? Oxygen...need O2!!
Oh dear...I think I'm going to be sick...wait is that the M&M machine over there? Maybe that'll make me feel better!
What would you do?
Believe me this is a big deal for me, a big deal to participate, to share with one person, and face the facts myself. I know I am larger than life. I know I am 100lbs overweight. Everyone around me knows that too. It's obvious because come on...we can all see people! Yet to see the cold hard facts in lovely green ink, on the bulletin board. Ack! Oh no, oh no.....I think I'm going into anaphylactic shock!
So, this is what I did....emailed the three people in which I know one of them, if not two, would be responsible for this faux pas.

Hello Ladies,

Okay. I’m about to make a bit of a big deal out of an obvious mistake and oversight on someone’s part…and it doesn’t matter who, in fact I don’t want to know who so please don’t tell me…but I just need to express my surprise, disappointment and feelings about this.

It was fairly shocking and I’m sure my retina’s are burned from seeing my initial weigh in weight posted for all to see on the Weight Loss Challenge tracking board.

I know where I stand as we all are aware of our own situations but to see it in print when it is supposed to be confidential was a huge surprise.

If you want me to disclose and be the poster child, please ask first! Okay, I’m being cheeky here and trying to be funny and self-deprecating. I know this was an obvious mistake, yet it still is a little unnerving & makes my stomach sink.

Just please, be more careful. I make mistakes all the time too. I know that. This one though…is a little more personal.

It’s there now for all of us to gasp at, myself probably the loudest, and doesn’t need to be erased. What’s done is done. I’m just asking for a little more sensitivity and double checking next time.

Thanks so much….for letting me vent, listening, and not leaving Jennie Craig coupons in my mailbox.

M

My next course of action? I think I'm going to sabotage them all and beat their skinny little bums by anonymously leaving chocolates in the office every week. So there! I'll fix their little red wagons. Vindictive, aren't I?

TGIF

Ahhhh....Friday evening... a "no-nap day" transpires into an early to bed evening. Boys tucked in & asleep by 7pm. Me snuggled on the love seat with the mohair blanket, knitting by my side as well as a much enjoyed glass of chocolate mint Baileys and my favorite husband on the couch snuggled in a blanket of his own with a beverage of his own and the remote [go figure...men!:)]. Ahhhh....a quiet, peaceful end to a typically busy week.
May this Friday evening and weekend bring you peace and quiet too. Enjoy.

Dr. Naturopath...& other strategies

Today we visit Dr. Naturopath again with W in tow. Bup too...but that's just because he's so lucky that he gets dragged everywhere with us!

Yesterday's visit was overwhelming and encouraging at the same time. She is certain that there is help for W...which will take a little time 3-6 months...but hopefully he will respond more quickly because of the way we eat and he saw such success with that.

Basically it comes down to a "leaky gut" and the inability to release toxins on his own so he's a little boy running on an adult amount of adrenaline.

Heal the leaky gut. ~ This goes hand in hand with a book I read last year and deeply agreed with.

Support his liver and kidney's so that they can function properly and break down toxins properly.

Vitamin B12, etc, etc.

Rehydrate. NO reverse osmosis water. Terrible for drinking as there are no minerals in it. Whoa! I've been a huge RO fan...and that's what we drink. Tap water is better? Yup. Spring water is ideal. Tap will do just fine. Blew my mind but totally makes sense. Even my Water Well husband agreed!

Today we'll learn more and start the plan for W. Here's hoping!

On Sunday we spent three hours with our psychologist who gave us a step by step guide for handling non-compliance & physical aggression. He also pointed out that what we are missing in our parenting efforts is empathy.

Empathy.

Well, that hit my heart. I have always thought of myself as empathic but it's obvious that due to stress and frustration I don't relay that to W or Bup...I relay frustration and impatience. So there's a big one to work on. And we are working on it. All of it.

The next few days are going to be interesting....as most gets worse before it gets better right? Regression...frustration on the child's part for changing the rules...oh my gawd, we're out of Coconut Rum?! Seriously people!

Planning and preparation are a large part of succesful outings for us. I hate planning. I hate prep. I just want to go. My pants are the best for flying by the seat of...it's almost like using a parachute. So, in the effort to diminish pant flying I found these little goodies at Kids Source which will become a fixture in my purse.

Wait a minute....wasn't I supposed to get rid of the Diaper Bag as the boys developed?! Fairwell diaper bag...hello Busy Bag. Ah well....at least there are some cute big purses out there!

Okay, our busy bag of tricks includes a Leapster. Busy bag found at Kids Source. Busy minds = busy hands. I Spy Bag mainly for Bup but they can share. Water game. Weighted Vest.Snacks. ~Help! My shoulder hurts from carrying all this and it's quickly bypassing purse to rollie wheeled bag!!~

The Busy Bag and I Spy Bag could easily have been made at home...but I just...didn't. You could. Maybe I will in the future to change it up....

So, that's what's on the forefront for us at the moment. Lots of effort and hopefully lots of change...positive change...and happier moments. Here we go!!